Posthumous Timeline is a sexually explicit book. Since the title suggests that the work’s contents are autobiographical, and since its text’s pages contain graphic descriptions of the protagonist’s sexual adventures with hundreds of men, many of them HIV positive, readers may assume that the author of the book has already died of HIV himself. In fact, he is alive and well and quite HIV negative at the time of the authorship of this introductory passage.
Now, for the sake of argument, let’s say that the author’s sexual history closely mirrors that of the protagonist of Posthumous Timeline. So by what “miracle” did this “promiscuous” writer manage to remain AIDS-free? Actually, he relied on no miracle or even on a system of morality. Instead, he used a lot of latex, employing condoms for both anal and oral sex, whether passive or active.
Naturally, there were a few slip-ups during the course of these adventures, and in those cases—which the author is pleased to say were extremely rare—the virus happened, by pure chance, to not be present in his partner(s) or never managed to enter into his system or was successfully fought off by his own immune system. The author believes that had condoms not been used during the majority of his sexual encounters, he would not have lived long enough to write this book.
Now some readers may wish to debate the necessity of condoms during oral or even anal or vaginal sex, while others may wish to call the very existence of HIV into question. Anyone who would like to make a case for the futility of latex protection against HIV during sex is advised to first complete his or her own timeline according to the rigorous guidelines established within the body of this manuscript. Once the challenger has submitted all timeline data to the Centers for Disease Control for analysis at the end of his or her life, the author of Posthumous Timeline will be pleased to reconsider his position on what constitutes safe sex.
Those who advocate strict celibacy or monogamy as the only viable methods of preventing HIV are not exempt from the task of completing their timelines. Celibate persons are invited to remember that they must remain so for the duration of their lives. Monogamous persons must be conscious not only of their own adherence to their philosophy but of any discrepancies between their partners’ promise of faithfulness and their practice of it. After all, the most certain way to contract HIV is repeated unprotected sex with the same infected partner(s). If and when “accidents” happen to celibate and/or monogamous persons (or the partners of monogamous persons) resulting in the occurrence of “unplanned” sex, it will be important for researchers to notice if the involved individuals are more or less adept than “promiscuous” persons at employing the use of condoms.
As this data is being collected, the author will continue to experiment with as many ways he can dream up of enjoying his and other people’s bodies through latex barriers.